{For the next little while, I’m going to be blogging a little bit of catch up posts. More for me and my mom and sisters than anything else. But I thought I wouldn’t deprive you all of the pictures.}

When the boys turned six weeks old, we moved them out of our bedroom closet and into their big crib in their very own nursery. About a week later, we were packing up to move to Arizona. If it wasn’t heart wrenching enough to come upstairs one day to find their pack and play taken down, packing up their nursery was a whole new ball game. It broke my heart to take down the prints, cribs, and arrivals clocks. All that planning put away.

Cameron let me pack up the biggest poster to hang up here in Arizona. We brought their crib instead of just the pack and play. And for the next three days, I got to have my boys sleep in the pack and play right next to me while we camped as a family in our half packed up house in the living room.

Pretty sweet to let them be little for a couple more nights.

It was good for my heart.

When I fall behind when I’m writing in my journal, I have a really hard time “catching up.” The entire task overwhelms me so much that I stop writing altogether. To combat that terrible overwhelming feeling, I don’t hold myself accountable for everything I missed. I pick up where I am and if I feel like going back, I can. So, eventually I will post things about the move and our last few weeks in Utah, but for now here are some pictures of our morning.

Cameron came home from a run. I was finishing up feeding the boys and we decided to take them for their first swim. We couldn’t find swimsuits or even swim diapers in a size that would fit the boys, so I put them in some cloth diaper covers I made, without the absorbent cloth and out we went.

(Nash Blue, Gray Yellow)

I’ve been meaning to post these for a while now. Emilee came to visit us in the hospital the morning after the boys were born. I was so hopped up on meds that I wasn’t able to be a part of this shoot (still confined to my bed…stupid catheter), but she gave me these precious pictures to remember my boys on that first day of their little lives. I don’t remember much of this day besides just struggling to be present, but I am so grateful to have these. Grateful she could give me back that day, before the feeding tubes and monitors happened.

So thanks, Em. I owe you big time.

Gray Left, Nash Right

My sweet boys are a month old already! How did that happen? I feel like just yesterday I was in the hospital for monitoring. If the rest of their childhood goes this fast, I better start writing things down. I’ve learned that’s the only way to keep myself from panicking about life passing me by.

I’ve seen a lot of cute things done with monthly updates, numbered onesies, cute photos, etc. I’ve been told that I’m the kind of person people expect that sort of thing from. However, I have no idea what I would do with pictures like that in the long run. I don’t want to stress myself out every month trying to get these boys to cooperate and they tend to look darn cute with minimal effort on my part, so long as I don’t mess with them too much. It’s when I try to complicate things that everyone gets stressed and sad.

I did have the realization though that we will probably celebrate the 9th of every month for the next year, just like we celebrated the 2nd of every month for the first year of our marriage. This month, we took the boys to meet the wonderful people at the fertility clinic where everything started. Dr. Foulk and his staff are incredible. I’m so grateful for them and the friendships and blessings that have come from that relationship.

This month has been full of cuddles, spit up, smiles, cute faces, thousands of kisses and laughter.

Favorites from this month:

1. Cam was changing Nash’s diaper when Nash projectile pooped on him. Cam put his hand down to block it and immediately Nash started peeing. Completely exasperated, Cam just starts laughing and says “…Stop! Stop it!”
2. At one point, Gray was pooping, peeing, hiccuping, burping, and spitting up simultaneously. Poor guy just looked up at me with each hiccup as if to ask “what is going on, mom?”
3. I feed the boys at the same time, most of the time. Gray likes to touch Nash while they eat. Nash doesn’t like to be touched while he eats. It’s pretty entertaining.
4. The boys make some seriously great faces after they eat. Eye-rolling contentment and huge smiles. It’s wonderful. I know those smiles are just gas smiles, but they make me melt.
5. We’ve figured out bathtime. The kitchen sink is where it’s at. The boys love the warm water and calm right down. It sure helps them sleep better at night, too.
6. Nash was fussy one night after the 3am feeding. I rocked him for about a half hour until he fell asleep, which I’ve never had to do before, but I really loved it (for the first bit). This morning, Gray just needed some cuddle time before the day started. We hit the rocking chair for a few minutes and enjoyed the quiet. I love being a mom. I love being their mom.
7. We’ve really enjoyed taking the boys out for walks. They generally sleep through the entire thing, but yesterday they were so content in the sunshine, just looking around at everything.
8. They sleep really well right now. We put them down to bed at 8 or 8:30 and go back up to feed them at 10:30. Every time I walk through the bedroom door at 10:30, my heart just soars because they’re still there. They are our boys. They get to stay with us forever. This is a dream come true in every sense of the word.
9. I generally try to tackle the middle of the night feedings on my own because Cam has to get up super early and go off to work every morning. I have the option of sleeping in so long as the boys cooperate. He doesn’t. Sometimes, though, I really need his help. (Tandem nursing is tricky…) Cameron is pretty groggy when that happens. This results in some pretty great conversations. (Cam: Don’t worry. I packed their bags. Me: Oh? Where are they going? Cam: The Dark Side.)
10. Gray is a very voracious eater. Once he figures out it’s time to eat, he gets so dang excited. Noises, stretching, arms flailing. It’s quite a production. Nash generally just latches and goes. When Gray starts “being Gray”, Nash will stop eating and just watch him with an expression on his face that says “What is your issue, dude?” It cracks me up every single time.
11. Gray spit up in Nash’s ear.
12. We read a page out of the Book of Mormon board book every night for our family scripture study. One night we read the story of Nephi building the boat and talked about how we’re going on a boat this summer at Lake Powell and we will be on the houseboat with all of our family, just like Nephi took his family. Last night we read about King Benjamin and how sleeping is helping Mom and Dad and makes Heavenly Father happy.
13. Praying for our sons by name.
14. The first night we were home, Cameron wasn’t used to all the little noises the boys make in their sleep. For the first 3 hours, Cameron probably asked me “what’s wrong with them??” 15 times. We got him some ear plugs. He only had to wear them for 2 days.
15. General Conference. Cam and Nash on one couch. Gray and Me on the other. Pure contentment.

So, happy 1 month gentlemen! You sure are handsome.

We did manage to finish the nursery before our boys made their early arrival. I am too thrilled with how it turned out. I remember when the idea hit me for what I wanted to do in this room. It was the absolute middle of the night and I had just gone to the bathroom for probably the 4th time since we went to bed. I had been thinking a lot about how to raise two righteous young men in today’s world. All that kept running through my mind was “start now.” Start now teaching them how to treat women. Start now teaching them to study the scriptures. Start now teaching them about missions. Start now.

I came back from the bathroom and woke Cameron up.

“I know what we’re going to do for the nursery.”

“Seriously, Kristin?”

I was too excited. Inspiration had struck and I needed to share it with him.

“We’ll theme it around ‘I’ll go where you want me to go’. Vehicles, maps, travel, etc. It’s perfect.”

Needless to say, Cameron was much more excited to talk about this once the sun came up.

The biggest shot of the room I could get. The view going the other direction isn’t very pretty at this point. I’m still waiting for the boys to get a bit bigger so we can take a picture of the boys in these cute hats my sister made for them and blow it up for the wall over the cribs. Until then, it’s just big and blank.

That gorgeous changing table was built from scratch by my very own handyman husband. (Affectionately named “Handy Cammy” by my sisters.)

It was truly a labor of love. He designed it, built it, and stained it all on his own. It is perfection and I couldn’t be more in love with it. The right hand cabinet fits our hamper perfectly. The top drawer has diapers and wipes. Middle drawer holds all the cloth diapers I made until the boys fit them. The left cabinet is stocked with diapers and wipes from our baby shower. I feel so prepared. And once the boys are grown, it will make a beautiful console for elsewhere in our home.

I had a blast designing the prints above the table. The large one says “I’ll go where you want me to go” on a background of a subway map.

The heart print on the bottom right includes maps of where all the men in our immediate family served their missions. I love that our boys have so many good examples to look up to!

The clocks mark the minute our boys entered the world. On the far right you can see a shadowbox with two missionary tags that say “Elder Call” on them, from Cameron and his dad’s missions. Eventually that engagement picture on the far left will be replaced with a cute newborn picture as well.

I love the artwork above the rocking chair. My mom gave me a puzzle last Christmas of the US made up of license plates. I’d done it 3 or 4 times already and knew it would be just perfect for the nursery. Cam found a piece of wood at work, we put the puzzle together, he stained the wood with leftover stain from the changing table and adhered the glued together puzzle to it. Bammo, artwork for $0.

The curtains are actually two sheets we bought from DI. Cam cut them into strips and I sewed them back together. Each sheet cost $2. Curtains for $4. And they block out the sun pretty darn well.

I love this little pillow. I really wanted to include a tandem bike somewhere in the room. Two seats for two boys. I love that. And it only took about 10 minutes to make with my silhouette.

This “dresser” was really a great solution as well. Cam found it outside his work and asked if he could have it. Apparently it had been there for years. We cleaned it up and gave it a fresh coat of paint. Lucky enough, target carried bins for $6 that fit perfectly.

This clock is one of my favorites. We found it at RC Willey for $16 on clearance after a $25 giftcard we got from unsubscribing from their mailing list. Who knew?

I couldn’t be happier with how this all turned out. The idea of “start now” causes me to act a little differently. I know sometimes it feels weird to read a Book of Mormon board book to 2 week old babies, but starting now means the habits are being formed both in us as parents and in them. It sometimes feels weird to plan a FHE when the boys aren’t even old enough to focus their eyes on us or react to our facial expressions, but we’re starting now to develop a pattern of consistency and a priority on family time.

It’s not much, but it’s a start.